Misgiving Ch 30

“No, you idiot,” Cassandra’s voice could be heard from the hallway as she berated some poor banquet server who hadn’t been able to get out of her way fast enough. “Five o’clock, have you ever even seen a clock face before?”

Shaking her head, Anya focused on the sway of the tree branches just outside the estate’s windows. She leaned against the window panel and brushed aside the curtain, trying to ignore her sister-in-law as she tore into the underpaid staff.

It was a beautiful day, not a cloud in the sky--a good day to get married. She let out a nervous sigh and hugged her arms around her body. Anya didn’t understand why she felt nervous. She and Thane were already mated. This ceremony was just a formality for her friends and family. Yet she couldn’t ignore the butterflies fluttering in her belly.

Cassandra burst in through the door, a welcome distraction from the tightness in Anya’s chest, and threw herself onto the chaise in the center of the room. Sighing dramatically, she flung her arm over her face and cried, “It’s ruined, the whole thing is ruined.”

Anya smiled softly as she turned away from the window and moved to join Cassandra on the chaise. Sitting down beside her feet, Anya asked, “What’s ruined?”

“The wedding,” Lifting her arm a bit to peek at Anya, Cassandra explianed. “You might as well call it all off; there’s no coming back from this.”

“I tried to call it off,” Anya reminded her with a teasing smirk. “I didn’t even want a wedding, but here we are. So tell me, beloved sister, what has ruined my special day so completely?”

The look on Cassandra’s face was of utter defeat as she confessed, “The tea cups.”

For a moment, Anya thought she hadn’t heard correctly. “The tea cups?” she repeated, hoping that she really had heard her wrong.

Cassandra nodded. “First, they came in a forest green setting. Forest green.”

“That’s outrageous!”

Her sister-in-law nodded in agreement as she continued. “I ordered hunter green and jade, not forest green. And then, as if that wasn’t bad enough, these idiots place them on the table with the handles facing the wrong direction.”

Sitting up she spoke more fervently, as though trying to make Anya understand the true travesty of the situation. “I know it’s been a really long time since we, as a species, switched over to military time; but how hard is it to figure out five o’clock. I mean, it’s five o’clock at least twice a day.”

“You’re right,” Anya nodded at Cassandra as though she understood her on a level that transcended the spiritual. “Round everyone up and send them home. The teacup handles aren’t pointed at five o’clock, the day is ruined. My wedding is ruined.”

They shared a look for a moment before a giggle burst from Cassandra. She covered her mouth with a hand to stifle her laughter and nodded, conceding to Anya’s unvoiced observation. “Okay, you’re right. I might be overreacting just a bit.”

“Cassandra,” Anya gave her a teasing look. “You ‘overreacted’ to my strip tease last night. Today you are being a complete bridezilla.”

“I know, I know,” she leaned back against the chaise and sighed. When her gaze met Anya’s again there was a sincerity to her honey brown irises that was deeply touching. “I just wanted to make sure that everything was perfect today. It’s your wedding, it needs to be perfect.”

Anya placed her hand on top of Cassandra’s and smiled gently at her sister-in-law, flattered and humbled by how much she cared for her. Patting her hand, Anya assured her, “And it will be. You’ve already made it perfect, now sit back and watch all of your hard work fall into place.”

She breathed in a calming breath and exhaled her pent up concerns. Giving Anya a soft smile, Cassandra said, “I can at least try.” After a second her smile grew and she wondered, “Where did you learn to dance like that anyway?”

Shrugging, Anya admitted, “Observation mostly. Between Chora’s Den, Afterlife, and people watching at Purgatory I had some pretty good references.”

A disappointed expression fell over Cassandra’s features at Anya’s lackluster explanation. “Well that was underwhelming. Here I was, expecting you to tell me about your rebellious stint where you ran off with a band of asari maidens and danced across the galaxy before joining the Alliance.”

Anya laughed at her sister-in-law’s imagination and shook her head at the thought. “Out of the Shepard children, your husband is the rebellious one. We’re a military family; our lineage dates back to well before the Civil War, and Kael has the gall to turn his back on centuries of tradition and take the unbeaten path.”

She shook her head, remembering the heart attack that Admiral Michael Shepard had almost had.  “Not only did he decide to go to college instead of enlisting, but not three months later he called saying that you were knocked up and that you two were getting hitched.”

She smiled at Anya’s story, pleased with herself and the turn of events that was her marriage. “I think it worked out pretty well, don’t you?’

“Of course I do,” Anya also smiled at the daytime drama that was Kael’s life. “My brother’s happy, my niece and nephew are happy and healthy, and I got an amazing sister and spectacular wedding planner out of his misbehavior.” Pulling Cassandra into a tight embrace, Anya stroked her sister-in-law’s hair as she continued. “I’ve always envied my brother for what he has with you, and now I get to have that for myself.”

Cassandra squeezed her back, tightening her arms around Anya’s waist as she agreed. “You and Thane are really amazing together. I’m so happy for the both of you.”

As they parted from their embrace, Hannah Shepard entered the room with the bridesmaids in tow. “Here are my lovely girls.”

They were all done up in lovely formal dresses, but Hannah’s was the most elegant. The matriarch Shepard was sheathed in a fine beige dress that slid flatteringly down her body and hemmed just above her knees. The bust of the dress was garnished with a delicate lace, and the A-line collar was held up by a fine opaque fabric.

Her bridesmaids also looked elegant in their dresses imported from the finest designers on Earth. They were floor length gowns, made from an expensive fabric in a form flattering shade of maroon. The low cut collar, which Jack was thrilled about, pulled around the neckline and was held together by an emerald encrusted golden chain that fell down the backless dresses and dangled against their spines.

Tali’s dress had to be custom made by an upcoming quarian fashion designer. The expensive maroon fabric wrapped snuggly around her bust and torso before slitting down the middle and draping around her legs like a velvet curtain in a twentieth century theatre. Her enviro-suit was an exquisite second skin and she kept the golden collar around her neck, accentuating the dress in a regal fashion that very few women could ever pull off. They were all gorgeous, and Anya doubted that she would be able to compare.

Hannah approached Anya, setting her hands on the younger woman’s shoulder as she gazed at her daughter with love and adoration in her spring green eyes. After a second she asked, “Why aren’t you wearing your dress already?”

Anya looked down at the slip she had on and shrugged, “I don’t want it to wrinkle?”

Before Hannah could reply, Jack said to Cassandra, “Hey, trophy-wife, I think the banquet staff is setting the cake up with the little statue Shepard and Krios facing the wrong direction.”

Groaning, Cassandra picked herself up off of the chaise and stormed out the door.

“I sit down for five minutes and the whole thing comes down like a house of cards.” She was already halfway down the hall and her voice could still be heard as she hunted down the unfortunate staff. “I swear to God, if the icing is messed up on that cake I will maim all of you.”

Jack smirked at the other bridesmaids and commented, “She’s pretty scary for a civilian, isn’t she?”

“I’m a civilian,” reminded Oriana, giving the biotic woman a small smile. “You don’t think I’m scary?”

The look that Jack gave her was playfully demeaning. “You’re about as scary as Tali’s drone.”

Gasping at the offense, Tali argued, “Chatika is terrifying, you bosh'tet. I’ve had enemies die from the sight of her alone.”

Jack quirked an eyebrow and teased, “Die of laughter?”

“Don’t let her get to you, Tali,” Oriana came up beside the quarian and placed a friendly hand on her shoulder. Giving the biotic woman a sidelong glance, she said, “Jack’s just upset because she lost a bet.”

Anya’s attention whipped around to where Jack stood by the cheese table. Frozen in place, Jack slowly removed her hand from the tray she’d been reaching for and reluctantly turned around to face the youngest Lawson sister. Her light brown eyes narrowed sharply as she regarded Oriana. The threat was clear in her voice as she demanded, “Who told you that?”

Tsking as she shook her head, Oriana answered, “Jack, you’ve been grinning like an idiot all morning.”

“Not to mention how mean you’ve been,” Tali inserted. “I thought humans were supposed to become more bearable after they had sex.”

Oriana glanced back at Tali and informed her, “It depends on how good the sex was.”

Training her gaze on Jack, Anya leaned her weight on a hip and wondered, “So tell us, Jacky, was the sex good?”

Jack glared at all of them for a moment, even at Hannah who had become too enraptured by their repartee to look away. Furiously grinding her teeth, Jack sucked in a large breath before sighing her defeat. Her body sagged as she admitted, “Yes.” The grin that Oriana had mentioned returned to her face as she continued, “It was the best sex I’ve ever had in my entire life. And I’ve had a lot of sex, so that’s saying something.”

They giggled like schoolgirls and were pulled closer toward Jack by their curiosity. Leaning in close, Tali was the first one to voice her question. “I’ve always wondered: is all that bulk to compensate for something?”

Jack shook her head, her grin growing even more at the memory of the previous night. “That spanish stallion isn’t compensating for shit.”

“Alright,” Hannah intervened before the lot of them could explode into a fit of immature hysterics. “That’s enough of that. I would rather not be haunted by the visual of the Lieutenant’s privates on the day of my daughter’s wedding.”

“Now you know my pain,” replied Jack at the same time as the others said, “Sorry, Admiral Shepard.”

“As you should be,” Hannah’s scolding frown faded, revealing the teasing smile hidden underneath. Turning towards her daughter, she said, “Now let’s see about getting you into that dress so that we can start taking photos.”

Anya nodded with a sigh, knowing that the time would’ve come sooner or later. She was the bride after all, and it was time that she looked the part.


The estate grounds were something to behold. Thane had seen the beauty of human architecture while he’d visited Earth those many months ago, and also from the vids he had researched out of curiosity of the species, but neither of those experiences could have truly prepared him for the beauty of the estate hosting his wedding.

The four story, old English style manor was a castle unto itself. Its yard expanded for several acres, beautifully green and carefully tended to. The entrepreneur that owned this land rented it out for events such as this at a cost Thane was unsure he even wanted to consider. He wondered if he and Anya would have any money by the end of this affair; somehow he doubted it.

He watched as Cassandra cut through the lawn, barking at the event staff about the placement of the cake. Ever since she had taken it upon herself to plan this wedding, Thane had seen a different side of her; a passionate, no-nonsense, mildly terrifying side that he would be glad to be rid of as soon as the day was over.

Sensing that someone was approaching him from behind, Thane looked over his shoulder to see his son join him at the side lines. He gave Kolyat a soft smile, taking in the sight of his son dressed in a sharp tuxedo and admiring the handsome man he had become.

“Father,” Kolyat said in greeting as he stood beside Thane and watched as Cassandra, his would-be aunt-in-law, bossed her victims around. “Today’s the day.”

“Indeed it is,” Thane agreed. Turning toward his son, he adjusted Kolyat’s bow tie and smiled contently to himself.

Kolyat watched his father’s features as he fixed his collar and straightened his jacket in a way only a parent could do. “Nervous?” he asked, the jitters he must have been feeling clearly evident in his own voice.

Shaking his head, Thane answered, “Excited.” When Kolyat’s tie and collar were straight and his tux free of specks he allowed his smile to grow. He held Kolyat’s gaze as he went on. “I loved your mother, and will always love and cherish the memories we made together.” Thane looked back at the decorated lawn where the ceremony would reside, and admitted, “Irikah was my first love, but Anya will be my last.”

“I know, father,” Kolyat placed a hand on Thane’s shoulder and when he looked back to meet his son’s gaze there was understanding in those cerulean irises. “I love Anya too, and I think that mom would approve of her replacement.” he said with a laugh, fully aware that there would never be a replacement for his mother.

“Krios,” They turned at the sound of Michael calling Thane. Anya’s brother approached them, his steps heavy as he shielded his eyes from the sun. He was already wearing a pair of sunglasses, but the pale tone of his skin made it clear that the man was feeling especially sensitive to light today.

He stopped beside them and looked out at the lawn, watching as the last minute preparations were finalized and early comers started taking their seats. Michael had drunk a bit too much at the bachelor party and was paying the price today; however, he was showered and shaved and that was all that Thane could really ask from his future brother-in-law.

“How are you feeling today, Michael?” wondered Thane, giving the human a playful simper.

Anya’s brother dragged a hand down his face as he answered. “Like hell,” he groaned. “I haven’t drunk like that since college, and it still wasn’t enough to completely erase the memory of my sister dancing last night.”

“Yeah,” Kolyat agreed with a shake of his head. “That wasn’t exactly a memory that I wanted to have of my stepmother.”

Michael grimaced, the combination of his memories, over-drinking, and terrible hangover making him look like he might vomit. Swallowing hard, he held Kolyat by the shoulder to steady himself and pressed his hand to his stomach. “Can we stop talking about it, please. I’m feeling sick enough as it is.”

Kolyat and Thane shared an amused look before agreeing to not discuss Anya’s nimble performance in further detail. They watched as Michael fought for control over his stomach. “We have so much technological advancements and still no cure for the galaxy’s worst hangover.”

“Sorry about that, cabron,” said James as he, Garrus, and Niall walked over to join their circle. Laughing at the youngest Shepard, James slapped Michael on the back, purposely making him dry heave. “Shepard can drink me under the table on a good day, I just thought that it ran in the family.”

“Screw you, Vega.” Michael coughed until his stomach settled.

“Jack’s already got that covered,” Garrus replied on James’ behalf. “Doesn’t she, Jimmy?”

An arrogant grin spread across Vega’s features and he shrugged carelessly. “I can neither confirm nor deny that; but I can tell you that I’m not going to be anyone’s bitch-boy while I’m here.”

Niall’s mandible’s clicked into a turian grin as he joked, “Just playing the game, eh James?”

“More like winning the game,” James murmured, rubbing the back of his neck as he avoided their smiles. As he brushed an imaginary spec from under his eye, James suddenly looked very thoughtful for a moment. Clearing his throat, he shook his head and admitted, “I don’t know, hermanos; I think there might be something there.”

Kolyat bit back his laugh and when James gave him a pointed look, he teased, “Not you, too.”

“Not me what?” James growled, not amused by Kolyat’s amusement.

“Oriana has the wedding fever, as well,” Kolyat informed him, dodging the pseudo punch that James threw at his head. “One look at this set up and she’s giving me this look.”

They all gathered closely around, inspecting James’ features. Garrus took another step closer and asked Kolyat, “That look?”

“Yeah that’s the look,” Kolyat joked.

James shoved them out of his face and protested, “I don’t have a look.” His hazel-eyed gaze panned over all of them, suddenly concerned, “Do I?”

They laughed at James' expense for a moment before they acquiesced to the threatening glare he was boring into all of them. Garrus brought their attention back to Thane as he asked, “So, Krios, how does this compare to a drell wedding?”

Thane looked around at the wedding preparations, he sucked in a breath and smiled. When he looked back at his groomsmen and James, he answered, “Drell weddings are very spiritual and ritualistic; there is a lot of dancing and chanting.” His smile grew as he regarded the event staff bustling around them, making sure that everything was in its place and just the way Cassandra wanted it.

“We celebrate the union of Amonkira and his mate, Arashu. The recantation is of Amonkira’s desire to find Arashu, how he searches for her and desires her. But it is Arashu who chooses her mate, the man she deems good enough to be her Amonkira.”

Garrus’ mandibles flared as he considered Thane’s explanation. After a moment he wondered, “Will we be seeing any of that today?”

“Perhaps during the reception,” Thane replied with a chuckle. “I doubt that Cassandra would be very happy with me if we ruined her wedding.”

Michael shook his head, “I can’t wait for this to be over.” When they’re gazes all ripped back to Anya’s brother he held his hands up defensively. “What? No, I didnt mean it like I’m not happy for you and my sister. It’s just that my wife has become a monster because of this wedding.”

A low rumble sounded from the others as they all chuckled at Michael’s situation. All laughter came to a quick and final stop when the monster in question appeared behind them, hands on her hips and eyes narrowed as she glared at her husband.

“Oh, a monster, huh?” she growled, her nose flaring dangerously.

Michael froze; a look humans called a 'deer caught in headlights' spreading over his features. His hands were still held up, but now as if to calm a charging varren. “I didn’t mean it like --”

“Save it, Michael,” Cassandra held up a finger and shook her head. “I’ll deal with you later. Right now we all, except for you James, have a wedding to be a part of.” Clapping her hands as if she were herding the sheep to the slaughter, she motioned for them to hurry.

The string quartet started playing a lovely tune in the background and Cassandra waved for them to get a move on. Garrus nudged Thane on the arm and said, “Show time, Krios.”


“Oh, honey,” Hannah held her by the shoulders, her chin trembling as she gazed upon Anya in her wedding dress. Tears welled in her mother’s eyes and she fanned them away, looking up to avoid messing up her make up. “You look lovely.”

Looking down at her dress, Anya allowed a nervous smile to spread across her face. She glanced back at the full length mirror to take in the sight of herself and her smile grew, her nerves coupling with her excitement. “It’s not much in deflecting bullets, but it gets the job done.”

“It does a lot more than that,” Jack replied with a chortle. Pushing herself off of the nearby vanity, she strode up to Anya and handed over the beautiful bouquet. The flowers were in an arrangement of falling calla lilies surrounded  by babies breath, bouvardia, and amaryllis. It was a gorgeous culmination of flora, just like everything about the wedding. Cassandra sure did know how to throw a party.

“Where’s my little girl?” Admiral Michael Shepard’s voice called from just outside the hall as he was ushered into the room by Cassandra. Her father was dressed in his Alliance blues, the ribbons pinned to his coat professing his many years of loyal service.

He stopped at the doorway, frozen in place by the sight of her. Anya turned from the mirror to face her father and watched as a multitude of emotions changed his features. Admiral Shepard snapped his jaw shut, and brought his gaze up to meet hers.

Several seconds passed while Anya waited for her father to say something, anything, to her. When all  he could do was stare her nerves started to grow. Was it the dress? Did she look terrible? Did he think she was making a mistake? Gazing down at her carefully crafted dress, Anya made sure that there wasn’t anything wrong with it before she returned her gaze to her fathers and asked, “Well?”

“Well,” he replied, emotion thick in his voice. She then noticed the tears coating his moss green eyes. Clearing his throat, the admiral said, “My little girl is getting married.”

Nodding, Anya stepped away from the mirror and into her father’s arms, careful to not smear her makeup all over his ceremonial garbs. “It sure does look that way, doesn’t it, dad?”

He gently stroked her hair, careful to not accidentally put a strand out of place. “I was afraid that I’d never get a chance to see this day.” Admiral Shepard pressed her more tightly against him. “I buried you once. And now instead of seeing you off to the afterlife, I get to see you off to the man you love.”

“Dad, please,” she laughed as she pulled away from him and fanned her eyes to keep the tears from falling. Anya could easily hold herself together as long as her father kept the emotional stuff to himself. “Cassandra is going to kill me if I smeared my mascara.”

The Admiral cupped her face in his large, calloused hands and stared adoringly down at his daughter. “I love you Annie. I am so proud of you, and so happy for you.” Kissing her forehead he continued, “There isn’t a man in this galaxy worthy of you, but out of all of them Thane is the only man I trust to love and cherish you the way you deserve.”

She couldn’t avoid the sincerity of his words, or the pride in his eyes while he held her like this. Biting her lip to keep from crying she croaked, “Now you’ve done it.” she placed her hands on top of her fathers and thumbed over his knuckles. Two tears snuck past her defenses and spilled over the corners of her eyes. “Now I’m crying.”

“No crying,” Cassandra’s voice pulled them apart. She took Anya into her arms and made sure that her hair and makeup were still both fine. “We still have to take photos; red in the face and a runny nose don’t make for good pictures.”

Waving for the lot of them to follow her, Cassandra instructed, “Come on, the band is about to start up. It’s time to get this show on the road.”

Admiral Michael Shepard smiled at his daughter-in-law and wondered, “Have you ever considered joining the military, Cassandra?” His smile grew when she looked up at him. “You’d make a great staff sergeant.”

Admiral Hannah Shepard stood beside her husband and held onto his arm. Sharing a laugh with her husband, she agreed, “I’m sure Junior would just love that.”

They all exited the room and headed toward the back of the estate where the ceremony was being held. Anya swallowed hard past the lump in her throat, fighting off her nerves as if they were an exploding husk. Ask her to give her crew a motivational speech before charging face first into battle, she could do that no problem; ask her to exchange vows in front of a crowd and Anya was suddenly feeling stage fright for the first time in her life.


A beautiful tune flowed through the air as the band played their instruments, setting the atmosphere to a dreamy state. Thane looked out at the guests from his place near the altar. They had wanted a relatively small wedding, only their closest friends and family in attendance; it just so happened that Anya had more friends and family than they’d anticipated. And all of them had RSVP’d for a seat; no one wanted to miss this special occasion in the former Commander Shepard’s life.

A content smile had settled on his lips at the start of the day and hadn’t left him since. Thane was excited. This was his first human wedding; it seemed fitting that the last wedding he attended had also been his own. Looking up at the cloudless blue skies, Thane remembered how Irikah had looked the day of their wedding, how lovely she had been.

The tone of the band changed and Thane blinked back to the present, thankful for the memories Irikah had given him but eager to live in the moment where he accepted a new mate as his bride. One by one the bridesmaids started down the aisle, looking lovely in their elegant dresses. Beside him Garrus’s subharmonics trilled adoringly at the sight of Tali walking down the aisle; and Thane had to agree, she did look stunning in that custom made suit.

A little girl made her way towards the altar scattering rose petals as she strode to the music. Ana was still too young to be the flower girl, so Cassandra had rented a friend’s daughter to litter the walkway with flower petals for Anya’s grand entrance. Human weddings were strange; lovely, but unusual.

He was pulled from his thoughts when the music changed again and the crowd before him stood to their feet and turned around to face the estate’s yard facing stairway. Admiral Shepard stepped out from the double doors, leading his daughter from the house and into the sunlight. Time was suspended as Thane’s attention fell onto his bride.

Anya was a goddess enveloped in white. Her crimson hair was pulled back into a lovely loose braid, decorated with white and pink flowers. The beautiful lace dress draped over her wonderful body was crafted with such obvious care that Thane could tell from this distance the designs needled into the fabric. Her cheeks were rosy with blush and her plush lips were coated with a vibrant red color. She was the most gorgeous woman he had ever seen in his entire life and she was his for the rest of his days.

Thane was watching her closely enough to recognize the nervousness in her features. There was no reason for it, they were already mated, yet he could see it in her emerald eyes; his Siha was frightened. She and the admiral we're making their way down the stairs just as Thane’s attention was stolen by the men standing in line beside him. Kolyat gazed at his father with pride and love in his eyes; and his groomsmen nodded at Thane, congratulating him on his bride’s loveliness. He smiled at his groomsmen, fully aware that he was the luckiest man alive.

When Thane returned his attention to his blushing bride, he caught Anya's gaze and held it. The two of them stared at each other, trapped in the others gaze as a grin expanded across both of their faces. It was then that all the nerves left Anya's eyes, leaving only excitement in its wake. She and her father made it down the aisle and Admiral Michael Shepard kissed his daughter on the cheek before handing her off to Thane.

"Im trusting you with her, Krios," he stated as he shook Thane’s hand.

Thane smiled at his father-in-law and nodded, "Your trust is well placed, Admiral."

Beside them Michael inserted, "She's your problem now," loudly enough for only the wedding party to hear, who laughed quietly at her brother’s jest.

He and Anya turned toward each other, hands held and fingers intertwined as they stood in front of Admiral Hackett, who had been all too happy to perform this ceremony. The Admiral smiled at Anya, a fatherly sheen to his blue eyes. "You look beautiful, Shepard," he whispered.

Anya grinned at the admiral and replied, "Thank you for doing this for us."

Admiral Hackett gestured that their gratitude was unnecessary before standing at attention and addressing the crowd. "Since I'm a bit of a traditionalist, we're going to play this by the book.” He paused and gave both Thane and Anya a warm smile before continuing. “Dearly beloved we are gathered here today . . ."